I left off in my last post for the first time I visited Matt at his new house he shared with a guy who cooked meth in his basement. I had come over unexpectedly, and Matt was hiding what his roommate was doing downstairs.

Matty looked awful. He has always been on the lean side, but it seemed he had lost all his muscle mass and was just skin and bones. His clothes hung off his skeletal frame, and his blue eyes looked massive in their sockets. He was sweaty and fidgety and couldn’t sit still. He was talking a mile a minute and kept interrupting me every time I tried to speak. His eyes were unnaturally bright, but perhaps the worst part of all was the scabs. He has a bunch of pockmarks and little wounds all over his face, neck, and arms. It looked like he had just had the chicken pox or something. While I was at the house I noticed he kept picking at a fresh wound on his face. I asked him what had happened to him, joking that he must have been stung by a swarm of wasps. He just laughed it off and said he must have had an allergic reaction or a weird acne outbreak or something.

The house was a complete mess. Papers, clothes, and dirty dishes littered every surface. It was beyond the normal mess of a couple of bachelors sharing a place. Matty was a mess, too. His clothes were dirty, his hair was greasy and he smelled like he hadn’t showered or brushed his teeth in days.

When I tried to go into Matt’s room he freaked out and ran in there before I could open the door. I heard him opening drawers and shuffling things around before he let me in. Now I realize he must have been hiding his stash.

I knew something was seriously wrong. I begged Matt to come with me right then, that we would find him a treatment center to get him help. I pleaded with him to at least let me take him to our parents’ house and talk to them about what was going on. I could see he was addicted to something, I just didn’t know what or how dangerous it was.

But Matt refused my help. I should have tried harder, and every day I wish I had.

Keep reading to find out what happened next.